or as I like to call this post: “My Thoughts No Matter How Mundane Should Never Go Unpublished”
This is probably not even helpful to anyone. But I have nothing to say really. I have been doing a lot better, the pain for whatever reason, just doesn’t feel as raw. I have really dived into preparing for an upcoming pregnancy (not saying I plan to get pregnant) but that has really helped me to stay focus and keep putting one foot in front of the other, and to have a plan and goal, I guess. It may or may not be lingering on the border of unhealthy obsession- eh, so what?
There are days when I still feel really sad. And I do cry at night at times, but I have tried this trick of letting mondays be my mourning day. I wallow in all the misery I want that day. I cry, pray, yell, get angry, journal, write letters I’ll never send, talk about it with others…whatever I need to do. (I am working on a letter to my last midwife- respectful but poignant).
It seems to help when things start creeping up, I just remind myself that its not monday and the time to mourn will come. (like that bible passage that is read at funerals usually, but I picked out for my wedding)
(“Foodment” is placed in there so that any women with HG can skip that part, as even reading or thinking about food can be a vomitting trigger) Although if you have an aversion to reading/thinking about food, skip the rest of this post!
Anyway, in my post “List” I mentioned I wanted to make a grocery list. I call it my hyperemesis grocery list, because it is not the things that we usually have in the house when I’m not sick. As you know, we tend to eat a lot of whole foods, nothing processed, limited grains (only for the kids) and limited dairy(only for the kids). But when I have HG I have to eat whatever pops into my head that doesn’t send me in a vomitting spin. With Sawyer it was instant mash potatoes and big macs and potato chips (think high sodium content) This last time I wanted pop tarts and frozen pizza , things like that. A good thing (for my husband) that we live across from a grocery store. Hard to explain the HG food thing. It’s kind of like the funny pregnancy cravings, when women send their husbands out for pickles at 2am, ie you have to have it, except this is not really funny, because its kind feels more life or death desperate and I could rarely think about food without vomitting, and even if I get what I think will stay down, it usually won’t. (ps. I pick foods that won’t taste so bad coming back up- thats the cravings that pop in my head)
Foods that work in one HG pregnancy don’t always work in another, but I put them on the list anyway. I will also need simple things that can be made in a microwave (in the garage) for dinner for the kids (chicken fingers), and things they can also get themselves, ie snacks, juice, water etc.
So below is my grocery list. I printed out 20 copies. Because I wouldn’t need less, but hopeful I won’t need more (and dont’ want to jinx it). I figure we can hand these out to people who want to help with shopping, or my husband can take them and know what to get. From this list I plan to develop a meal list/small recipes too- I think for a two week intervals for the kids, as reference for the DH (darling Husband)
One day I’ll just share my whole binder and make it a sticky or a tab on top. But it’s not done yet.
Hyperemesis Grocery list
Circle what we Need. Cross Out what we don’t need. Write in additional items
String cheese lunch packs
Lunch Meat (turkey, salami, ham, American Cheese)
Prepared rotisserie chicken
Frozen Chicken fingers,
white (baked) potato
Boxed mash potato flakes
Cereal( honey nut cheerios, honey bunches of oats)
Water (Large gallon, small bottles)
Bread(sliced, hamburger buns, loaf)
Pop tarts strawberry with frosting
Gold fish crackers
Pasta (penne, spaghetti, pastina)
Apple Cider Vinegar
Personal Care/Paper Products
Diapers/Wipes (please let sawyer be out of diapers by this time!)
Large White Vinegar (for cleaning)
(all body wash/soaps/shampoo will be special ordered non scented from company I like. DISH SOAP will be soap nuts/ no smell as far as my non HG nose knows)